Rules... Please Adhere

With Friday's show at O'Gara's upon us and many of you - a couple hundred? - showing up, I thought it would be helpful to go over some of the ground rules for watching The Subsidies. These are very important in helping to provide a fun outing for everyone. Please follow and we'll all have a blast!

1. Don't ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, .... ever ask us to play Freebird. Seriously. Within the first 5 minutes of playing at Rookie's last weekend, some woman walked up to Grant and asked for Freebird, even forgoing the usual, and equally annoying, "Freebird" chant. Folks - this is not cool, nor is it even topical. We're not playing it, hell we don't even know it. Which leads us to ...

2. Yes, we are a cover band, but please don't ask us to play one of your favorite artists or songs. We have a set list, built to impress and entertain all set to go and are going to follow this. "Pantera!" "Godsmak!" "Sweet Child of Mine!" - No, Never, No! Just dance and listen, don't interact unless directed to. And you know what, no one likes Creed.

3. If you're a woman, wear something you can dance in, preferably high heals and a Subsidies tank top. If you're coming to see us, you should plan on dancing and it is important to wear appropriate "current-style" outfits (taupe is ALWAYS cool). It helps us, it helps you. 'Nuff said.

4. Shots. Yes, we like shots, but admit we prefer "girly shots" such as "Kameeze," or "Scooby Snacks." Make fun of us, but do so as you're buying us a round of drinks.

5. Unless you are dancing, do not - NOT - come up and simply stand in front of us and stare at us (Wine Box Guys, ring a bell?). The area in front of the stage is for dancing, not your personal pulpit upon which you shout out (see rule #2) horrible song requests or tell us how awesome our guitars are or how much better your band is, etc... Dance or go sit down. "Hey dude, is that a Gibson... stupid!"

6. Laura, our bass player, is an attractive woman and wears clothes that would signal she is ready to "party" in a non-church sanctioned way, yet this does not mean you should climb around to the side of the stage and try talking to her or asking her out or finding out what her "deal" is. She's there to entertain the masses with the band, not explain to you, while playing killer bass, that she's "just not that into guys whose most treasured item on this planet, aside from their old high school football VHS tape, is a drinking trophy."

7. Air guitar-ing is frowned upon, but not illegal - yet... limit this activity.

8. Ignore our drummer's dialogue. For some reason, unbeknownst to us, he feels the need to talk - a lot. He'll jabber on while we're midway through a slow jam, going on about who the hell knows what - even going as far as exclaiming, mid-song, "We nailed it... we nailed it!" Ignore him and concentrate on the music, otherwise you'll find yourself trying to figure out what the hell is coming from the man with the sticks.

9. Again, no Freebird ... too important to simply gloss over. Do you realize everyone thinks you are a tool?

10. Dance, support the bar, sing along and HAVE FUN ... We aim to provide a fun experience and will do so with or without you, but with you is so much more enjoyable! See you Friday at 9-ish.